“ego is the single biggest obstruction to the achievement of anything.” – Richard Rose.
Most of the times your “Egoic self” becomes a greatest hindrance in advancing towards your goal or purpose in life. It is human nature to feel happy when praised and many of us feel offended when criticised or corrected. That is the egoic self which is in play.
Egoic mind gets conditioned by our environment and upbringing and your identification gets compulsive through association with objects and people. This kind of conditioning of past lets ego to identify with things and people. The impulsive and involuntary thinking that you are more important than those around you or being superior takes you over and separates you from your authentic self.“ The ego tends to equate having with being: I have therefore I am and the more I have therefore the more I am.” – E. Tolle.
This identification with your made up self thereby activates stressful reactions in your body and create resistance to joy, happiness and abundance that you desire to create on your journey towards your goal.
Ego is not our nature and it is a created phenomenon. Here are some ways to transcend ingrained ideas of self-importance to help you identify with your purpose.
Let go of “I Know It All” attitude.
Ego cannot bear to admit that it does not know enough. By revealing “I Know It All” attitude, ego grows bigger, rigid, and self-willed, and opinionated thereby taking control over you. All that the mind knows is the borrowed information. A mind filled with information or full of knowledge makes you believe that you are the doer and takes hold on your authentic self. Let go of this habit and set yourself free.
Let go of “I am right, you are wrong.”
Being right strengthens the ego and pushes you in the direction of making others wrong. You get used to a habit of making others wrong in order to get a greater sense of who you are. Feelings of anger and bitterness replace loving and kindness.
“ Every ego is a master of selective perception and distorted interpretation.”
Be aware of your egoic interpretation of others by differentiating between facts and opinions. Embrace kindness and try to see the totality of a person or situation. Reject the need to be right always.
Let go of “ I am Superior.”
“True nobility isn’t about being superior to others or someone else. It’s about being better than your former self.”
Don’t assess others on the basis of their appearances, achievements, or possessions which are the indices of ego. There is no point in proving yourself superior or criticising or belittling other person’s knowledge or abilities. Instead be aware that we all have same creative force available to fulfil our goals.
Let go of “ I need more.”
“Always it is your true self which is perfect – it wants / needs nothing: It is your ego which is imperfect- it wants/ needs everything – “ M. Jeffrey
Ego strengthens its grip over you by creating a need to have more. This feeling of “not enough yet”makes you always strive thereby eliminating the possibility of ever arriving. The need for power or the need to be in control or for more creates a feeling of insufficiency and lack that needs to be filled. When you drop the habit of needing more, more of what you desire will arrive. You tend to create more by letting go of the desire for more.
Let go of “ I need to win.”
Ego divides us into winners and losers. Winning in all situations might make you competent enough. But egoic mind fears the opposite of winning. You start to feel worthless and insignificant if you lose. Do not identify yourself with your achievements. Lesser the need to take credit for your achievements, the more you stay connected to your abilities to win.
Let go of “what others think of me.”
You have no control over what others think of you. There is a great difference between “what others think of you” and “what you think others think of you.” This over concern of others perception of you lets the ego to have a strong hold and starts guiding you based on others opinions. Disconnect from the opinion of others and connect to your purpose. Let your purpose guide you.
Let go of assigning “negative mental labels.”
Assigning negative mental labels to people or situations will further strengthens ego. Ego loves to complain and feel resentful. This way you tend to feel negative towards the people and the situation you are in and tends to treat the moment as an end or an enemy. These grievances further turn into stronger negative emotions and hinder your personal growth. Drop the habit of complaining and being resentful .
Don’t let your ego convince you that the world shouldn’t be the way it is.
Ego is our hell and we are the creators of it. We create and suffer from stressful thoughts there after. But it is within our capacity not to create and move away from such created self. Become free of ego by being aware of it and by not getting identified with it. Be focused on your purpose.