Ten Techniques To Stop Procrastinating

Don't let procrastinating take over

The comfort zone is a psychological state in which one feels familiar,safe,at ease,and secure.

If you always do what is easy and choose the path of least resistance, you never step outside your comfort zone. Great things don’t come from comfort zones. -Roy T. Bennet.

#1 Take five minutes, right now, to identify what you are putting off.

#2  Do one of those tasks right away. Action eliminates anxiety.

#3  If getting started is the hardest part, set a designated time slot to do the task.

#4  Beat boredom by using your mind by thinking something challenging.

#5  Imagine you have only few years to live.

#6  Don’t worry about perfection. What counts is quality of effort, not perfect results.

#7  Avoid using phrases like “I wish..” , “I hope..”, “May be I’ll..”. Instead say “I will”.

#8  If what you are putting off involves other people, consult with them.

#9  If you fear the consequences for this action you’ve been avoiding, ask yourself, ” what is the very worst things that could happen if I did it today?”

#10 Vividly picture how free you will feel once the task is completed. Free from anxiety.

Tips for better parenting

Parenthood is very demanding task  and plays an important role in developing a child’s overall personality. Parenting has a far reaching effect on children’s character, behaviour and their achievements as they are a reflection of the experiences they have at home with their parents. Although all parents wish their children to have courage, compassion and high morality, yet very few put in conscious effort to achieve this goal.

Parents often complain about their children’s disobedience, lack of discipline and disregard for the rules set by them. The reasons for these problems though varying, are not difficult to seek. More often than not they lie in faulty practices.
Parenting is not a skill that everyone is born into. It is a learning process. Parenting if practiced sincerely, can definitely help resolve certain of these problems and even where there are none, will enhance their bonding

What is required is unconditional love, treating them with respect,encouraging them for independent thought and appreciation for their efforts however trivial they may seem. Parental criticism, over demanding nature and lack of sensitivity to their problems widens the communication gap between them and the child. children slowly drift away from parents and stop taking them into confidence. Parents have to make a genuine effort to bond well with their kids.

Some Do’s and Dont’s 

                         Bonding, Happiness, and happy parenting

1. Discover the reasons.

It is so important not to damage children’s confidence. When they do something wrong, find the reasons for the inappropriate behaviour and habits. Make them realise that it was their behaviour that was bad and not them. Love them unconditionally yet set certain rules that are workable and enforce them.

2. Choose the right time

Never discipline them when you are angry. Parents should never openly contradict each other in front of their children. Do not try to release your stress on them and use them as an outlet for your frustrations. Spend quality time with friendly interactions with your children and healthy discussions. Be available to them at all times for their physical and emotional needs.

3. Create confidence

Listen to them with undivided attention. Encourage a dialogue instead of lecturing. If there is something to debate, ask what they know and think of that particular topic and learn to respect their opinion and their knowledge.
Value their opinion and give them freedom to express themselves freely quite often. This creates a healthy self-respect and makes them feel accepted and appreciated.

4. Avoid nagging

Do not be over demanding with the children in order to make them into whom you want them to be. Imposing your wishes on them and making strict rules will only result in making them rebel against later. Learn that your children need not follow your foot steps. Encourage them to take right path to achieve what they believe in and help them to go further than you are.

5. Accept them with good & bad

Give them freedom to disclose those things that make them unhappy and to share what they truly feel. Accept them with their strengths and weaknesses, so that they are capable of seeing themselves honestly. This will make them understand that there is no need to hide something from parents

6. Never compare

Instead of comparing your child with other children, compare with your own child’s previous performance and efforts put in towards it. This would motivate him towards better performance. Always appreciate the efforts put in and encourage them to dwell more on hard work and not just on success and failure

7. Express appreciation 

Be consistent in expressing your appreciation. Express your love and affection to your children quite often. Do not assume that they understand an occasional pat. Focus on their strengths and not on them. Ignore minor inappropriate behaviour and encourage rewarding their good behaviour.

Beauty lies within…just be

There is this very famous Zen story, where a Zen abbot went dressed in rags to the door of a rich man  and was turned away with an empty bowl. So he returned in his formal robe of office and was invited in and served a sumptuous meal. Removing his robes and  placing them in front of the feast, he walked away saying “This meal is not for me, it is for the robe.”

Many of us perceive others by the way they are dressed or the way they look. Similarly there is a vast difference in how others perceive us to what we really are. This fundamental difference in perception gives rise to a false self which would want to seek appreciation and acceptance from others. At this moment, we start to draw comfort from various ideas people have put together to define a standard behaviour.

We begin to allow ourselves get influenced by what others think of us. We try to impress and start imitating what we see around us, thereby losing our true self. We deny our inner self because others won’t or can’t recognise it. Thus, fading our soul which is meant to be unique, mysterious, and beautiful.

Trying to fit into others definitions of you not only erodes your self esteem but also becomes a continuous struggle to become what you are not.

Resist the temptation to allow others define what you are. Do not deny your own beauty because others fail to recognise it. Instead accept yourself and know that beauty exists not in sameness but in being your true self.
Know that you need not match with someone else’s definition of pretty and regardless of outward appearances, at the core of heart, each one is perfect, pure, and with same potential.

Eternal Chase… Short story by Osho

God made the world, and from that very day the sun went running after darkness. And darkness could not understand: it has not harmed the sun, it has not even talked with the sun, it has not even met the sun, yet the sun is continuously harassing her.
After millions of years of harassment, she finally got tired and went to God and said, “It is ungrateful to complain, but there is a limit to everything. I have been harassed for millions of years, and I cannot conceive of any fault on my part. The sun goes on expelling me from everywhere. It is even difficult to take a rest without anxiety — the sun may be coming, the sunrise may be close. I have not slept for millions of years — the anguish would not allow it. The sun has been almost a continuous torture, and without any reason. I simply want to know: what have I done wrong?”
God said, “You should have come earlier. There was no need to wait so long. This is very ungentlemanly on the part of the sun. The sun should be called immediately.”
The sun was called. He asked the messenger, “What is the problem? — because I have never done anything wrong. I simply go on doing the same routine every day. Since God made me, I have not done anything else.”
But the messenger said, “God is very angry. You have been hurting, harassing a poor woman — darkness.”
He said, “My God, I have never heard of her. I have never met her. I am not interested in women at all — I am a born celibate. I am coming, I want to see who this woman is.”
And as the sun came to the house of God, darkness disappeared.
God said, “Where has that woman gone?” They searched everywhere; darkness was not found.
Millions of years passed again, and one day the woman appeared and she said, “You have not done anything; it is still continuing, the same torture.”
God said, “You are strange. When the sun was here, where did you go?”
She said, “You are behaving like a simpleton. If the sun is here, I cannot be here; if I am here, the sun cannot be here. We cannot stand each other. You will have to hear our story separately and then decide.”
God said, “That is not my way. You both have to be present here so I can be certain that nobody is lying.”
The woman said, “Then it is better I take my complaint back.”
Since then, the woman has not appeared again. Once in a while the sun comes to inquire, “What happened to the woman — because I want to clear it up, it has become a worry on my head that somebody is being hurt by me, perhaps unknowingly.”
God said, “You need not be worried. The problem is such that it cannot be solved. I cannot give any decision unless you are both present in my court together and I have listened to both sides in the presence of each other. But by the very nature of things, you cannot both be present. That woman is your absence. So of course you cannot be present and absent simultaneously. Drop your worry. You are doing perfectly fine, and that woman is not going to report against you again. The file in your case is closed.”
  • Osho
Exactly the same is the case with darkness and human awareness.
When we realise the self through awareness, we further discover this self in everything, and we become an awakened one. With this constant reflection of inner light, 
the darkness around us disappears and dissolves.